By: Hana Dawood

There’s often an underlying tension for immigrants. One that’s not spoken about or may not even be consciously recognized by many. It can be often seen as a quiet collision between two forces: the desire to be seen, versus the fear of being misunderstood. Sure, these two forces are an underlying tug of war between all of us, but this paradoxical experience is significant for the average immigrant. 

To be seen is a deep human need. Every being carries a complex and deep perspective on life. For immigrants this can feel more desirably urgent. Especially in the digital age, more thoughts on stereotypes are being spread, opinions on certain immigration groups are more pronounced than ever. It’s hard to avoid hearing about the distortions and misconstrued stereotypes. Constantly entering spaces, where no one knows your history, where your accent can be reduced to a set of assumptions, can lead to a more urgent need to be truly seen and known. But alongside those desires, there remains a persistent fear; what if I’m misunderstood?

Misunderstanding for immigrants carries a much heavier weight. Being unable to read or pronounce a word can be labeled as lack of intelligence. The difference in cultural mannerisms can be misinterpreted as coldness or lack of interest. Being misunderstood doesn’t just create awkwardness, but it can risk the feelings of belonging and confidence. Overall, these little differences can accumulate and carry a heavy weight on immigrants’ shoulders.

Over time, these polarizing desires and fears can begin to dictate an immigrant’s everyday interactions. Thoughts may become more filtered; conversations are often more calculated. And even sometimes words are chosen more carefully to avoid any misunderstandings and to ensure clarity. These small adjustments can further raise the internal question of whether one is expressing their true self, or if one is toning themselves down to be understood. The constant tweaks may feel like one’s identity is being softened or even hidden away. The feeling of lack of authenticity can greatly impact an immigrant’s view of themselves.

For immigrants, being seen is not a passive experience but rather an active process that is at risk for being misunderstood. Ultimately this tension does not fully go away but it can grow with oneself through awareness. With the right amount of acknowledgement, immigrants can navigate these colliding forces and balance between authenticity and being understood. It may be important to realize that one force should be more dominant than the other one in certain spaces. For example, in professional settings, clarity may matter more, while in friendships, authenticity should come first. There is not one clear answer on navigating these forces but rather an ever evolving and learning experience, one in which space should be made for immigrants to exist fully.